My road to motherhood 

I never thought that motherhood would be for me or comprehended having a mini human to care for and look after. Nevertheless, about 18 months ago something soon switched in me and I was so excited to start trying for a baby. I had never felt so strongly about it and I think it was definitely fate as I fell pregnant almost the day we started trying.
While I had expected to be excited when I first fell pregnant, I was in shock and seeing that life inside of me for the first time was incomprehensible! I have to admit I was so scared and it became very real once we heard that heartbeat. Hearing that heartbeat for the first time was incredible, we definitely had been blessed. 

Around the same time of this exciting news for our family that the first grandchild and great-grandchild was to be expected, our rock to the family, my Nan, became increasingly ill and we found out in March last year that she actually had multiple myeloma. Cancer had riddled her body and consequently, had crushed the discs in her back and eroded her vertebra. I spent several months by her hospital bedside crying and praying that she would make it, almost forgetting that I was pregnant. 

She cried to me saying how excited she had been to see her first great-grandchild and how devastated she was as she was never going to be able to see her, the doctors had given her two days to live. I prayed that she’d be able to see Grace and thank the lord today she is still with us a year on! It shocked not only our family, but the doctors too. We were beyond relieved and thrilled that she is still with us today.

As my Mum suffered from post natal depression, I grew up with my Nan and Pop who have been my second parents. So the thought of her leaving us was unimaginable, especially at this time of our lives. 

Before I even knew the sex of our baby and around this awful time, my Nan had a dream in hospital that we would have a girl and name her Grace! My husband and I had already agreed on the name Grace if we had a girl (no one knew this) and literally a week later (after my Nan telling me her dream) we found out we were having a girl! We named her after my Nan (Lorraine) and she is Grace Raine. 

To this day, my Nan is undergoing chemotherapy and has had the doctors amazed at her determination and fighting spirit. I hope that Grace inherits that. She is an inspiration to everyone around her. I remember my Nan say that when you’re a grandparent, you live for your grandchildren and she has definitely fought to live to see her great-grandchild.  


My Nan and Pop with Grace – We drove straight from the hospital I gave birth to see my Nan who was bed ridden at the time.

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 My Tips on How to Survive Sleep Deprivation

 

When you hold your newborn for the first time (particularly with your first child) you don’t actually realise just how much they are about to change your world!

The actual hospital stay wasn’t all that bad.  She was sleeping.  I wasn’t.  I’ll blog about my birth experience soon but to cut a long story short, I had a planned caesarean and was in a lot of pain and extremely uncomfortable. 

When we arrived home (about 3 days after birth) for the first time, how stupid was I to think, “yep she’s fed and asleep, let’s get to bed!”. Oh, how wrong were we haha #thestruggleisreal

Ever since my little darling entered the world she has not liked sleep much.  Kind of like how I used to be (idiot haha).  

Tomorrow marks Gracie’s 9 months!  Although it has flown, our bodies have still not entirely recovered from all the broken sleep nor has the sleeping even improved all that much from the newborn days.

Here are my top 10 coping mechanisms that have gotten me through so far….

  1. Family – If you can get the help, definitely take it! There is that saying, it takes a village to raise a child. It’s not easy, particularly when you’re a first time mum, adjusting to mum life. It’s hard. It’s not glamorous and most of the times you’ll be feeling like you’re not good enough.  It definitely gets more manageable and newborns are hard work – make the most of it though as it really doesn’t last as long as you think.  I am so thankful my husband and my family (especially my mum and mother in law) were always there at the drop of a hatch to lend a hand. I don’t know if I could have gotten through haha the sleep deprivation was real – but I managed to get enough sleep to function and feel slightly human. 
  2. Coffee 🙏 This beautiful and glorious drink has been the holy grail to my sleepless nights and has gotten me through the day (and those long nights).  I don’t like having too much caffeine in my system as I’m still breastfeeding, but even one sweet sweet creamy Latte does the trick! Mm… could go for one now haha! 
  3. Netflix/Foxtel – I’m not much of a reader, plus when you’ve had no sleep the last thing you feel like doing is picking up a book to read or just concentrating in general.  So, TV or Pay TV is crucial for those nights where your newborn wants to stay up feeding every hour or two, for hours on end!  I would set myself up in our entertainment room and binge watch Game of Thrones, Call the Midwife or my beloved Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Plus, always good to have some lollies handy (milkybar was life!).   
  4. Getting fresh air – I found that getting out of the house was so therapeutic! As simple as taking Gracie for a walk in the pram or baby carrier around the block or to the park.  It’s important to take the time to go outside and get some fresh air, definitely kept and still keeps me sane! 
  5. Going on a date Its important to take the time out for you and your partner from being parents now and then, and just being a couple.  As beautiful as it is being new parents, try and make the time to go on a date, whether it’s going for a drive, going  to your local coffee shop, dressing up for a dinner or to the movies. My husband and I try to make the time often, but definitely every month since Grace was born.  
  6. Having a bubble bath or taking a long shower – I always find that when I now go to shower I’ll spend not 5 mins but 20mins in there.  Whether it be shaving your legs or having your hair washed – nothing beats that! Make sure you take time for you and enjoy those little easy luxuries.  Run yourself a bubble bath, I love doing that and just relaxing for 20mins.  Easy and very therapeutic! 
  7. Having a hobbie – I believe it’s important to have an outlet from being a Mum. It’s nice to do something little for you! Whether that’s taking on study, painting, reading a book, exercising or for me, sewing and making clothes and cooking.  I try to do these sorts of things regularly throughout my week, even if it’s just me and Gracie at home.  She’s at the age now where I can let her play and not have her be as dependent on me so it’s easier to do a few things for myself! 
  8. Long drives – This is a fave. Mind you, she hates the car unless my husband sits in the back. I don’t mind driving, I find it quite peaceful. She ends up sleeping for about an hour or so, so we just go for a big long drive up mountains, through the city or through the suburbs.  I find this allows us to chat a little, clear our mind and gives Grace a good sleep too! 
  9. Playgroup – Playgroups are awesome for Mums! You can be around other mums for some grown up conversation and your babies learn to play and interact  with other children whilst being distracted from the usual demanded attention.  Plus it tires them out! Score! Haha I started going when my little babe was about 6 or 7 months. 
  10. Seeing friends – You may find that the change is quite dramatic into motherhood. You were once a social butterfly with all the time in the world to catch up with friends and go out partying. You may feel far from socialising but I believe it’s somewhat important to still keep in touch with friends.  Obviously, in the first few months it’ll be a challenge just keeping your own shit together, but planning a coffee day, catch up at your or your friends place or even dinner out will make you feel great! I know the first time I caught back up with my group of friends away from my babe I was really excited to have that interaction with them and it is worth the effort (even if you’re feeling too stuffed)! 

These things might not be for everybody but they sure have helped me through this crazy,  awesome and amazing ride of motherhood. 

    My little babe is our greatest achievement (I can definitely speak for us both).  Life may be completely different now, but I wouldn’t change a thing!

    All I can say to new Mummas out there is to embrace the change, love and cherish every minute as time passes so quickly and we have truly been blessed being Gracie’s parents!

    See those sleepless nights were worth having this face to stare at!! 😍 

    V DAY QUIZ

    baby-quote

    In the spirit of Valentines Day, I found a cute quiz to get to know my better half and I.

    It might sound cliche, but truly everyday is Valentines Day with Aaron.  We never really celebrate V Day, but thought this year marks our 10 years together so why not haha!  Each and everyday we make the effort to show our love toward each other and how much we appreciate each other.  He definitely brings out the best in me, and I hope I bring out the best in him.  It has almost been 10 years (this Sunday!) since we’ve been together.  Can’t believe how time has flown by!

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    Who’s older? Me, by about a month.

    Who was interested first? Definitely me, he rejected me a few times but I finally got there haha

    Who makes the most mess? Me

    Who has more tattoos? Neither of us have tattoos, or like them enough to have one.

    Who’s the better singer? Neither of us, we both can’t sing to save ourselves haha

    Hogs the remote? Me

    Better driver? Him, I’m a road rager

    Spends the most? Me

    Do you have children together? Yes, 1 daughter

    Did you go to the same school? Yes, same high school

    Who is the most sensitive? Me

    Where do you eat out the most? Probably our local coffee shop or Nandos

    Where is the furtherest you two have traveled together as a couple? Vanuatu and Fiji

    Who has the worst temper? Me, I am short tempered

    Who does the cooking? Both of us, but I love to cook so I mostly do

    Who is more social? Me, I love heaps of people around

    Who is the most stubborn? Me, Aaron is very patient haha

    Who wakes up earlier? Him, I hate waking up early

    Where was your first date? The movies almost 10 years ago!

    Who has the bigger family? Both have about the same size fam

    Who does the laundry? He does mostly

    Who picks where you go to dinner? We are both indecisive, usually ends in picking it out of a hat haha

    Who wears the pants in the relationship? We both do, we make a good team!

    People come and go and that’s ok! 

    It’s always painful losing those who were closest to us.  It’s never easy letting go either.  The saying goes, friends come and go, but I don’t find that comforting at all or particularly easing the reality of a friendship breakup. 

    I’ll never understand why and I just need to accept that that is ok!  Is my life completely ruined by it? No.  Do I wish it never happened? Of course! Is there much I can do to change the way the person feels? No, and you can’t force someone to be friends with you. 

    I’m such an extrovert and it’s always been a battle of mine to just have people to like me and accept me for who I am.  But I shouldn’t need to feel like that and should  feel comfortable in my own skin! It’s so hard when you feel so vulnerable and when it’s times like this, it’s even worse for people like me! What have I done? Did I offend her?  

    Mind you, what becomes important and your priorities when you’re older is really those closest to you, your family.  I barely have time for my beautiful close friends as it is.  Friendships are two way streets, you have to meet in the middle – that’s where failure in friendships are sometimes inevitable.  

    Life is short. Be with those who lift you up and who bring joy to your life and happiness with them.  Friendships are special, but really your family is forever!  

    Life is so good and I am truly blessed to have a beautiful little fambam and people who support and lift me up on the daily ✌️🙏🏼 

    F I R S T blog post!

    My name is Amy and I am terribly new to blogging.  I thought hey, my baby (8.5 months) hates sleeping by herself (only on my chest or in my arms) so I’ll use my time to blog rather than sit and watch my real housewives on TV. 😂  But I seriously can’t stop watching these shows, so bad, so good!

    I am 24 turning 25, I have been with my husband for 10 years and of that, married for 5.  We have a beautiful daughter, Grace, turning 1 this year in May.  We have two cats, Tulip and Leo.

    I love being a mum and have a totally newfound respect for my mother and Nan!

    Although at times I can seriously be stressed out or feel like I’m just a shit mum, even just her smile makes everything better and I wouldn’t have it any other way.


    G & A

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